Emergency Vacation

I am taking an emergency vacation. I called my boss and informed him I needed a vacation...right now. I really didn't give him a lot of choices. I thought the weekend may be enough to get my head back on straight but it doesn't appear to be the case.

What is my problem? I have lost my passion. It wasn't until I had a long discussion with my psychologist (the Queen) that I realized what my issue is. She is right though.

This is not the first time I have had to deal with this. Usually my self-healing practice is to take some time away from everyone. I will stare at the stars waiting for the signs. I will listen to the words of nature. I will smell the aroma of life. I will feel my guiding wind. For some reason, things are getting harder to digest.

I feel numb. The Queen thinks working on the new website will help. To be honest, I know what is missing. I just have no way of fixing it. This leaves me out of control of my own life...my own destiny. This means, I am living my nightmare. For a long time, I held onto my dreams of moving to Clinton and opening a bookstore. As time (a linear discussion) moves forward, I begin to wonder and doubt that this will ever come to fruition.

I tire from my job. I am weary of the future. I glance back at the past making sure not to dwell on it. I have a mission in my heart without the means to commit to it.

This brings me to my point (as I almost always have one). Take a break. People often take family vacations, vacations with friends, or just stay at home with family and friends.

Maybe, just maybe, if you took a vacation by yourself, you may find more than you expect...well-being.

Did you know...

Americans take an average of just ten days per year vacation. In France, the law guarantees everyone five weeks of vacation, and most full-time workers get two full months vacation.

Comments

Anonymous said…
There's always friday on the train my friend. Your missed.

Mex
2:22 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Rebranding My Life

Image
I may have mentioned this before. I am adopted. So because I wanted to get to know myself better, try to find blood related family, and find any risks in my health, I decided to send in my DNA to 23andme. All of my life I have been told I am Native American (1/2 Lakota, 1/2 Cherokee). Granted, the information came from my mother who wrote it all down once she heard it from the adoption agency in San Bernadino, CA. I looked Native American. I have the same body type and proportions as most Native Americans. Come to find out, I am not nearly as much Native American as I believed. It appears I am mostly European. Yep. This is a bit of a shake up. My whole life has been a lie! Well at least my heritage. But nonetheless, I am coming to terms with the fact I am now a white person (googles becoming a white person support group). Granted I do have some Native American, but not a majority. Several things have happened since I received the report on Friday. First, I had to ...
Read more

I blame it on my nerves…

Image
Yesterday I admitted I was very edgy. I sometimes wonder what facilitated all of these problems with my nerves. Could it be a genetic defect? Will I be walking down the street one day and start slapping myself across the face? Could it be a possession? Can I be possessed by my departed father? Is this his way of getting back at me for not eating those tomatoes he was forcing upon me in my youth? I still don’t eat tomatoes (at least not raw). Maybe I am being possessed by my departed brother or first wife. I sometimes think that it would be easier to explain why I feel like I need to slap someone up against the side of the head with duct tape by blaming it on someone else. But I am sure it is not someone else. I think it may be because of the President. Hey, everyone else blames it on the President, why can’t I? I should sue. The cross-examination: My Wonderful Attorney: Mr. President, is it true you have caused grievous harm against N8ivWarrior and his family by making him do things li...
Read more

Behcets as an Adult

 It wasn't until I found out my birth mother had Behcets that I could finally put all of the pieces together of what I have dealt with all my life. Behcets is a rare disease that may or may not be genetic. In my case, it is. My birthmother had it, I have it, one (possibly more) child has it. For me, I have shown symptoms throughout my life. It most commonly shows in puberty, but I suspect they will find the genetic version is life long. This week, I had the worst flare-up I have had in a very long time. I have counted 3 mouth ulcers around the teeth and gums, and one nasty bastard right by the vocal cords in my throat. Talking is an impossibility. Accompanying this round is joint pain. That means the few stairs I need to climb become more of an effort. Anyway, I hope you all are staying healthy. I hope this all goes away soon.
Read more